Brooke Van Velden Is Here To Give You Certainty

Uber for Brooke Van Velden?

That’s me! Mind if I jump in the front? Now what you want to do is to turn right just up here.

I don’t think –

No no, trust me. Best way to anywhere is to keep veering to the right.

I’m not sure –

But I am! And talking of being sure, it’s your lucky day! I’m here to give you certainty about your employment status. Or lack-of-employment status, maybe. Could be. Just saying.

That’s nice thanks, but I’m all sweet. I’ve got certainty already. I’m certain that I’m employed by Uber. The Employment Court said so.

Did they, though? Did they really?

Yeah they really did. With holiday pay and sick pay and the minimum wage and everything. And then the Court of Appeal agreed. So I’m certain I’m an employee of Uber. Double-certain.

Are you though? Are you? What does the Supreme Court say?

It hasn’t been to the Supreme Court.

Well there you go! And you know why we have a Supreme Court, don’t you? For when the Court of Appeal gets it wrong. Which it does. Frequently. So where’s your certainty now, Mr ‘May Not Actually Be An Employee Of Uber After All?’      

Hang on –

I know, it is confusing isn’t it.

No it’s not. The law says you just have to look at the real nature of the relationship.

‘Real nature of the relationship’? That’s all very Mills-and-Boon up-in-the-air stuff.  No wonder you’re feeling gas-lit.

I’m not feeling gas-lit.

Aren’t you though? Aren’t you? Look, forget what those courts tell you.