Crowd Goes Wild At The Frickin' Netball

Well what a great ANZ premiership netball final we’ve just watched. And here is Prime Minister Christopher Luxon. Welcome Prime Minister, did you enjoy the game?

What I am saying to you is that netball has always had a special place in my heart. It’s a fantastic example of hard-working Kiwis striving for a better tomorrow. They’re great role models. And lazy frickin’ bottom-dwellers would do well to get off their backsides and be more like them.

Strong words there Prime Minister.

Well yes I’m just road-testing and benchmarking a few new expressions after my regular focus groups reported I was coming across as too weak. So go the frickin’ netball!

Yes let’s talk about the netball, why don’t we. Were you supporting one particular team tonight?

Ha ha you won’t catch me out there. No I’m just happy we got to witness the hard-working Kiwi skills of both of my favourite teams, the TicTacs and the JossSticks.

The who what?

And a big shout-out to the crowd who were laser focused on the game, more hard-working Kiwis there and even now they’re still giving it one hundred per cent. Everywhere I go I’m hearing great things, like the awesome reception I got when I stepped out on court just now. Listen to them!

Prime Minister, they seem to be saying ‘Boo! Boo!’

I think you’ll find they’re saying ‘Blue! Blue!’ – a ringing endorsement from the grassroots of the government that I lead. And something you won’t see reported in the mainstream media, when there are so many economic indicators showing that the country is getting back on track.