Gas-Bagging With Matua Shane

Kia ora, it is I, Matua Shane Jones, the sweetest kumara of them all. Tell me, how may I bestow my beneficence upon you?

We want money and we think you should give it to us.

Ah money. It makes the world go round. And given that the world that goes round revolves around Matua Shane Jones, naturally I am interested. Proceed – but wait! When you say you want money, are you struggling to pay a prescription fee that was previously free?

Nope.

When you say you want money, are you first-home buyers who can no longer rely on the government to give you a hand?

Nope.

When you say you want money, are you public-service quit-smoking advisers whose program has recently been defunded?

Nope.

Good, good. But who are you then, asking Matua Shane to reach deep into his trousers?

We’re the oil and gas lobby!

Oil and gas, you say? Now we’re talking turkey. Speak to mighty me of your plan.